June 17, 2008

What would you do?

Tonight we went out with one of my husband's high school friends. He called to let us know he was in town for a conference and wanted to meet up for dinner. We enjoy when people visit. It is always nice to see family and friends while they are in town.(It is always frustrating to hear people were in town after the fact.)

When he called my husband asked if he had anywhere in mind he wanted to try. Maybe something he didn't have back home. He named a place downtown that we hadn't been to before. We knew it was a bit more expensive, but wasn't sure how much more expensive, and really couldn't then say we didn't want to go there.

We went, had a nice time, and enjoyed catching up with an old friend
(and interestingly enough, this friend is married to my cousin). However, just for my husband and I, the bill was around $60.00. This didn't include the appetizer (as our friend insisted he pay for it), or the tip. We also didn't have dessert. This only only for the one plate of food we each had! It wasn't like we ordered the most expensive thing on the menu. We were actually almost as frugal as we could be without sharing something (which in hindsight may have been a good idea). Our friend's bill was nearly as much as ours, however he did pay for his meal, the appetizer and his dessert.

Now, I understand some people make more money than we do (which in his field is very likely). Additionally, some people may not be as frugal as we may be. In either case, that is fine. However, this friend plans to visit us again, bringing along his wife, and wants to return to this restaurant. Maybe they can afford this, however we cannot afford $60.00 meals. Additionally, we are not comfortable spending this amount of money on one meal, even if we could!

Don't get me wrong, we do our fair amount of spending on eating out and fun stuff. However, our splurging on dinner is usually around the $25-35 range (not $60). Plus for things that cost more, such as a concert, vacation, or other larger item, we save for it! We are not okay with relying on our credit cards.

We are by no means set financially, however are financially okay if we stick to our budget. So what do we do? Do we buck up and put it on the credit card, or basically save up for it? Or do we sheepishly admit we don't have the money and ask to go somewhere a bit cheaper? We don't want them to feel bad and pay for it for us, or "report" back to other friends of family that we aren't doing okay . Thoughts?


  1. If it were me, I'd just tell them that I'm "cheap" (not meaning you are) and that I can't justify spending that much money on dinner. I'd rather spend it on something for me. Then it's not an issue of you DON'T have the money, just that you chose to spend it a different way. Or, offer to meet up for dessert.

  2. I agree with Angie ask about meeting up with them for dessert, or even better tell them that you would love to host them for dinner at your place and make them a nice dinner that fits within your budget. I'm sure they would love to come over but don't want to be a pain to you.

  3. $60--ouch! We hardly ever eat out, and when we do, I usually have a coupon or something. Seriously, I'm the queen of cheap!

    I agree with the dessert idea, or having them over to your house.

    Honestly, if I spent $60 on a meal (and I have a family of 5), I'd feel sick afterwards!

    Hey, thanks for your comment on my blog. I love the name Crazy Daisy! So fun!


  4. I can understand - that is a lot of money! Something similar happened to me once because our friend suggested a restaurant that I didn't realize was so pricey.

    Maybe suggest another restaurant? (You don't have to give the reason.) Or, if your friend insists on going to the same place, maybe you can share a meal with your hubby? (You could always eat a small snack before you go so you're not so hungry.) Or, you could always offer to cook dinner at your home?

    Hope it works out - keep us updated!

  5. Dessert and coffee is an excellent idea. Or say you've got a craving for something specific and suggest a less pricey restaurant.

  6. Thank you for all the suggestions! They are all great, however I'm really liking the dessert idea, as otherwise, we never order dessert and this gives us a special reason :-)

  7. I'd invite them over for dinner or suggest meeting there for dessert as others have mentioned. If they really want to go there for dinner, eat before they come and then order something small at the restaurant. Appetizer for two, or soup and salad?

  8. I was so going to be all smart and suggest dessert out at the fancy schmancy place, but I see others beat me to it! And dessert really is the best part, anyway!