May 13, 2008

Ridiculously Ambivalent

Remember this dream job I have been ogling now for months, and interviewed for just last week? Well now the reasons it may not work are starting to out weigh the reason it would be perfect. However, Even after pondering it, talking to my husband about it, explaining the situation to my friends and co-workers, I have no idea what to do.

To put even more weight on deciding, I have a 2nd round meeting coming up! I was called today to meet in the next 2 days with the President of the College! I felt excited, yet wanted to run the other way. I still feel strong about the job and how it would provide me with many great opportunities, however some things have come up that I'm not sure the good outweigh the not so good.

I don't want to go through with the next meeting (on Wednesday!) if I'm sure I don't want the position. However, I don't want to back out at this point, as 1. I'm a people pleaser. So many people have given me good references, and put in a good word for me. I don't want them to feel it was all for nothing; 2. I really did want this job. However, maybe others will just look at me as an ambivalent mess, and not be as supportive next time.; 3. What if I am really supposed to have this job, take the risk, and become a stronger person through this, and I back out? How do I know? Sure, meditate, pray, talk to others... done all that. Still haven't a clue what to do.

Any other ideas? HELP!!!


  1. I would say at least go through with the second meeting. You never know if they're going to offer you the job or not, and it's always great experience. And if they do offer you the job, you don't by any means have to take it. I would definitely go through with it if I were you. It's not a commitment by any means that you're going to take the job, but at least that means it's still an option. Good luck. The job search process is awful!

  2. Kim,
    Usually when asked to be willing to be a reference for job hunting people understand that means a reference for multiple job opportunities. I wouldn't worry about that too much.

    And I would go through with the second interview. Based on everything you've said over the last few weeks, I don't think you really want to burn that bridge. I know one of your concerns is that it isn't full-time, but that may be a blessing in disguise if you intend to have kids someday. Or it may have the potential to be full-time in the future or lead you into a similar position full-time in the future. Good luck with whatever you decide.

  3. Thanks for all the suggestions... I am willing to try just about everything, even standing on my head if that is what it comes to!

    I have decided to go ahead with the 2nd interview and hopefully that will shed some light on something that will help me make a decision.

    I hate all this pressure!

  4. ok, good luck then! I don't want to give you more pressure, but I tagged you...
    you don't have to do it if you don't want to.

  5. Things usually have a way of turning out the best way for us. So go to the second interview and maybe while your there the picture will become clear. Wishing you success!

  6. Since you've decided to so the second interview (which was did it go?), I'll give you this sage advice:

    Sometimes you just have to pick a direction and leap. Whatever way you go, do it with conviction and know that new opportunities are always around the corner.